Highly sensitive people (HSP’s) are not the same as autistic or those with ADHD although many also are HSPs too! What many HSPs have in common is a heightened sense of awareness of what goes on around us including the dangers, problems and issues that may occur but haven’t happened yet.
Heightened Awareness This heightened awareness means we take in an abundant amount of information all the time and sometimes we struggle to process it all - especially when we are triggered into fear and doubt. Imagine a traffic light. When we are in the green phase we are calm, peaceful and easily joyful. The moment that we get stressed or sense some danger we move into amber which triggers fight or flight response. Red is for trauma and significant life incidents like death of a family member, a car accident etc. For those of us who are HSPs and empaths we have a much more easily triggered central nervous system (CNS). When we go into yellow, our CNS becomes heightened and if we don’t have the tools to bring us back down then we can easily get overwhelmed and feel anxious all the time. Add to that a diet that doesn’t support a calm CNS, sleep-deprivation, no alone time to recharge you’ll then you have inflamed nerves and feel uncomfortable in your own skin. Extreme Life Experiences Perhaps like me you’ve had a stream of significant life experiences too which have put you in the yellow and now you’re not even sure what green feels like anymore. You’re just waiting for the next shit bomb to come and in a constant stage of anticipation. Always on edge. You'll have heard me talk about the death of my daughter, a divorce, raising a highly sensitive son with chronic sleep deprivation, low-self esteem, constant self-doubt and starting my own business has been intense. I call this my soul squeeze. What I've realised though is that once I had faith that all these moments were happening for my greater good, I started to trust life and the universe and what it was offering me. I'll share with you that I am now happier than I have ever been and I'm grateful for my total soul squeeze. The secret to creating a life that you love is to search for what makes you feel calm. Tap into your warrior-ness as if your life depends it (which often it does!). The more you calm you are the more you’re able to connect to your best authentic self, and this means living a life with purpose, meaning and joy! Doesn’t that sound wonderful? Deferring to Others As an empath / HSP we can be overly accommodating of other people’s needs. We are generally people pleasers and want to be of service and make other people happy. This is one of our strengths but it can come at a huge cost too. By always deferring to the other person’s will we can end up in negative relationships (narcissist / empath) and look to other people to tell us what to do and what’s in our best interest. The problem with deferring to someone else’s view point is that often the people we turn to also have issues and are not to best people to give advice. The word here is discernment. It’s wonderful to feel like we have friends and family to help us through our challenging moments but we must be discerning in who we ask. Also, by constantly asking for other people’s opinions we are not learning to trust ourselves and by believing we have no control over everything we become powerless. You see, anxiety, fear and control are connected. They are toxins in our thoughts and body. They are like a virus that needs to be cleaned out. The biggest lie of all is we are told that we do not have control over our thoughts. One of the most empowering things to realise is that there is one thing you do have control over: yourself! You don’t have control over others, you don’t have control over your work or how other people react to you BUT you do have the choice to have control over yourself. Even in the moments when you feel like you don’t have control over your emotions or feelings, I want to remind you that you can learn. You have the choice in every moment to take daily, consistent action to learn how to trust yourself and to deal with your emotions. So how do I start? You start by doing everything you possibly can to calm your CNS. That’s your number 1 priority. 1 - Create a safe space at home where you can relax and feel calm - surround yourself with blankets, candles, essential oils, music…. Whatever it takes. 2 - Connect to nature. Get outside and be with plants. 3 - Eat plants. Fruits, vegetables etc. They are incredible for your CNS. 4 - Breathe. Using a breathing practice like the 5, 5, 5, 5 mentioned here - will help bring you into the present moment where don’t get overwhelmed with the future or the past. 5 - Use plants like essential oils to create your emotional toolkit to calm yourself. Create your own unique blend and aromatic anchor! 6 - Breathe. Using a breathing practice like the 5, 5, 5, 5 mentioned here - will help bring you into the present moment where don’t get overwhelmed with the future or the past. 7 - Positive affirmations (See below) My friend called me the other day to tell me that she’d been using the doTERRA Peace blend and it had such a profound affect on her that she wanted to lie down and relax… despite her two little ones wanting the total opposite! :) Once you have calmed your CNS down, you can then start to connect with what resonates with you. This is important because what resonates with you is your guiding force, your higher purpose and you’re divine being. It’s the compass that will steer you towards your best most authentic self… and joy. More on this later. Here are my top 8 essential oils for HSPs and to make your own blend: 1 - Lavender 2 - Roman Chamomile 3 - Vetiver 4 - Frankincense 5 - Rose 6 - Bergamot 7 - Copaiba 8 - Vetiver Once you’ve created your blend you can then create your own positive aromatic anchor. Here’s a great article by Casey Von Iderstein about how to create your own. Lastly, remember that this is a journey to connect back to heart and who you truly are. You are a beautiful warrior of light and this is your time to shine. Much love Dawn xx p.s. The Affirmations are (and say these every day!):
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